Tag Archives: inspiration

Stoked In 2019

Looking ahead into the fiery morning sky
Looking ahead into the fiery morning sky

Hey friend hey! While many of us are still in holiday recovery mode, some are also looking ahead to resolutions and goal setting for the coming year. I am in the middle. I could seriously use a nap right this instance. Instead, I am working and mulling over my word for the 2019. I have shared with friends that my word for 2018 was REIGNITE. I chose it after analyzing the year 2016 when I let many things that I loved, fall to the wayside due to the busyness of life and a bout with depression (a little transparency here). I found myself primarily doing the things that I HAD to do to survive. Those things kept me busy but not fulfilled. When I selected REIGNITE after attending a class in 2017, it caused me to take action in a way that I hadn’t before. Continue reading Stoked In 2019

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Much Less So

Hello. Tis morning

you invade my thoughts once more

this time, much less so

Each time, I’m startled

by soft rain of tears inside

wounds reopened

You are brilliant light

Lightning, blinding and followed

By boom, in seconds

violent impact

upon your crash landing

but you never notice

Aloof, you never

Notice the ground where I once

Stood- black and splintered

the atmosphere shift

the ozone layers, my heart

depleting more, see

your eyes overcast

you play me as the extra

each interaction

moment of our lives

hostage to bloodlines formed long

ago, egg, sperm, time

five minutes of lust

a lifetime of consequence

stars never aligned

I welcome the ride

reject your disasterous

damaging entry

Implore you to go

Or stay, remain in my dreams

Waiting, for response

an answer that won’t

come easily, or quickly

now, shallow breathing

in slumber you love

me, think of me, but only

give chase til I wake

As the sun rises

sets, by sullen, angry sky

you are swallowed whole

Gone. Tis morning again

you invade my thoughts each time

each time, much less so

Change is good… when you know how to make a dollar out of 15 cents

After months of being in a rut with my natural hair (no desire to style it or anything!), I went into a local salon and asked an old friend and sister to cut my hair like a picture I’d found on Facebook. She used to keep my hair tight when I wore it short years ago. I’d sent her a pic a week prior asking if she would cut it. She asked if I was sure and told me I should think about it. She promptly stopped communicating with me for several days! Haha!! I knew that she really wanted me to think about it and so I pondered over it heavily for several days before we spoke again. I had limited availability so when during our next text message, she said I could come on Wednesday on my lunch hour, I said “yes”. Yet, on Wednesday, I almost backed out. My son pleaded with me to keep my long hair. He shared that my journey inspired him to have a love for natural hair (that’s great, I did my job!). At some point I phoned a friend expressing my hesitation and she called me a “punk”. Thanks a lot Rhonda!

I thought theleast I could do was show up at the salon and chat with my old friend. I sat in the chair and after asking if I was sure- she shaved the left side. I used my iPhone to glance at myself having reached the ultimate, point of no return. As she rinsed color from the hair of another client, I thought about changing my mind and leaving with my undercut. In the end, she and I got through the ordeal which seemed more painful to her than to me. Ultimately, I left a happy camper experiencing ZERO regret. I did not allow negative thoughts to talk me out of my plan. I allowed change to happen and I felt better for it.

See… you probably thought this post was about hair. Perhaps you even experienced some anxiety on my behalf, or negative feelings toward a change I wanted to make within myself. If you had encountered me during the process, you might have talked me out of it. I might have allowed your opinion to change mine. Or- you might have applauded my efforts. Either way, the important thing is this- CHANGE CAN BE GOOD. WITHOUT IT- WE ARE STILL THE SAME OLD DOLLAR BILL. We have to be willing to change parts of ourselves without hesitation or dependent on the opinions of others. This one is for my good. Today, I’m walking around feeling like a shiny, new quarter ready to be spent! I feel very capable of making decisions for myself after having given my ideas lots of thought. I have long fashioned my processing after the sculpted “Thinker” figure my mother kept atop the mantle of my childhood. The key is to allow change to happen gracefully, moving yourself and others out of the way. Take time to understand the associated risk and the pay off! That’s what I did with a simple decision about a haircut. I weighed the pros and cons. The cons were minimal. The worst that could happen didn’t outweigh the best that could replace them. I can’t stop smiling at myself in the mirror. I feel bold and as my girl Kisha said, I have “balls” for just doing it on a whim before I could change my own, or allow others to change my mind. I’ve begun to see things around me mIMG_0971 (1)ore clearly since I let go of that old hair; allowing the journey of others to inspire change in me… to get ME moving in a myriad of ways I’ll share later. I got to thinking about the things I’ve been neglecting, the loss of my time due to work and other obligations and how my true passions have been neglected.Just like my hair, I needed to change… to figure out how to make a dollar out of 15 cents (as I sang in my childhood. I now know what that means!). I’m working on that and have made an effort to change the way I go about spending my time. I am wearing my physical and mental change in thought on the inside and it is reflecting on the outside. That brings me to exactly how we should see change- as something to review, ACCEPT but DON’T DWELL on the hard parts (ex: for me- I will need to go to the barber/salon  more!), FIND the good (no more long styling sessions!), and EMBRACE only the good aspects. That’s a good revelation for me. And to think it all started with a simple haircut.  But this… today.. ain’t about hair. 😀

~Peace and Love Always